10 Mistakes Every Bride Should Avoid

10 Mistakes Every Bride Should Avoid

 

In today’s economy most brides are looking for ways to cut costs. However, there are some mistakes that you should avoid because it could potentially ruin the wedding of your dreams.

 

1. Hiring a Location Coordinator vs. an Event Planner. When finding the perfect venue for your wedding, locations tend to encourage brides to utilize your location coordinator instead of hiring an event planner. The pitch often is delivered as a way for you, the bride, to cut the costs of your wedding planning. The problem with this is, most of you new brides don’t realize the importance of an event planner.

 

Here are a few things to consider:

• Is your Location Coordinator going to ensure that your wedding phases from one moment to the next successfully? (i.e. who directs the guests where to go after the ceremony, who begins the first toast, first dance, etc).

• Is your Location Coordinator going to bring you an extra pair of shoes at the end of the night when your feet hurt? Or are they going to ensure your gifts are packed safely away before you and your new husband make your grand exit?

• Furthermore, is your Location Coordinator going to ensure that all vendors and guests have left the venue spotless so that you can receive your full deposit at the end of the night?

If you answered no, or aren’t sure about the answer to any of these then I highly suggest you hire an Event Planner right away.

 

2. Hiring “Uncle Bob” to photograph your wedding instead of a professional photographer. Uncle Bob is typically known for taking the family pictures at Christmas time. He always has the latest gadget and has been boasting about his new camera to anyone and everyone that has ears. Certainly after having paid thousands of dollars for his camera, his photos of your wedding should be near perfect right? Wrong. There is so much more to photography than an expensive camera. On your event milestone, would you really want to rely on Uncle Bob documenting a day that there are no “do overs”? What happens when your “first kiss” as husband and wife happens and Uncle Bob is fidgeting with the settings and completely misses it? Does Uncle Bob have backup equipment in the event his equipment fails? Does Uncle Bob realize he is going to commit to showing up in the early stages of your bridal preparations all the way to the end of your reception (we are easily talking 8+ hours of shooting time)? Or in an extreme situation, what happens when Uncle Bob has a personal or work related emergency that he MUST attend to? Does that mean you need to find a replacement photographer who will be available on your wedding day with just 24 hours (or less) notice? We can all completely understand that you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. You should politely thank “Uncle Bob” for his generous offer but tell him that you would prefer that he is a guest who gets to celebrate with you at your wedding. You want him to come and enjoy the celebration with the rest of your family and friends, have a drink or two and promise he will save you a dance at the end of the night. This is a gentle approach at telling him, no, and at the same time, you get to work and hire a professional photographer. Your photographer will be hired to work for you that day let them do their job and you go find Uncle Bob and dance with him and enjoy your night.

 

3. Thinking that this day is all about the YOU. This is an equally important day for your husband-to-be. Gone are the days of “it’s the bride’s decision.” That way of thinking is a surefire recipe for disaster. Just because your fiancé isn’t interested the flowers, or the color of the bridesmaid dresses, doesn’t mean that he won’t be interested in other aspects of your wedding coordination. He may be interested in selecting the venue, or the DJ playlist. In fact, he may become more interested in the colors of the wedding, when he realizes he and his groomsmen will be wearing this very same color as the bridesmaids and let’s face it……who doesn’t love cake?! I am confident he will enjoy the cake tasting as much as you! There is lots of planning taking place that he can offer his opinion on.

 

Keep in mind, that not including your fiancé on the wedding planning could potentially feel demeaning to him; that’s not the way you want to make him feel. Your wedding day is equally important for the BOTH of you, so include him in the planning as much as possible. Besides, it’s a great way for you both to come together and make decisions as husband and wife.

 

4. Planning an outdoor wedding at the peak of summer. Summer weddings are just as popular as ever. Brides and grooms should also think long and hard about how comfortable the guests will feel during those hot summer days sitting in the heat. Sometimes older family members and friends can’t handle the heat as much as others. One wedding I attended it was so hot, that one of the groomsmen passed out and collapsed during the ceremony because of heat exhaustion. Of course the ceremony had to take a brief pause to ensure the groomsman was ok and continue, but it was certainly a moment that could have been avoided with a little bit of thoughtful planning. So it’s important to keep in mind that if you do want a summer wedding, and the location will be outside, to perhaps check with the venue to see if they provide individual umbrellas or if you can rent some cute umbrellas from a rental company. And of course, provide plenty of cold water.

 

5. Allowing Bridesmaids to select their own dresses. Some of you brides are rebels and LOVE to go against the grain; believing that allowing your bridesmaids to select any color dress in any style they want is the perfect idea for keeping everyone happy. To be honest, it is the perfect recipe for disaster. Let’s say you have 5 bridesmaids, each are in the bridal salon selecting a gown. Now each go into their respective dressing rooms and all 5 come out in the worst clashing of colors you’ve ever seen! Some of them are wearing long gowns, some wearing short gowns, some have lacy material, others have chiffon…..oh the list can go on and on! At some point you, the bride has to step in and start setting some ground rules on what you do and don’t like…after all, it is your wedding.

 

There are subtle ways you can get what you want without ruining relationships due to a strongly opinionated friend or family member. If you want for it to be a win-win situation for everyone, you should advise the wedding party of certain parameters they must stay within. You can tell everyone to wear a gown that is of the same color family, and the same material and let them choose what style compliments their shape, and makes them feel gorgeous with their selection.

 

6. Choosing to NOT have a full makeup trial run before the wedding. It is very important to not only “test drive” the makeup that you will be wearing for your wedding day, but actually having the makeup fully done as if you are getting married that day is important. While you are working with your MUA (makeup artist) you should partner with them in choosing which colors and styles will work with your personality, your hair, your wedding dress and what will translate beautifully in photos. A really great way to get this started is to schedule an engagement session with your photographer. Then schedule your appointment for a make up trial run and make final decisions on the colors that make you feel beautiful. {Bonus Tip: this is also a fantastic way to see how long it will take for the MUA to complete your makeup when planning your final wedding timeline!} After your engagement shoot, you have the opportunity to review your photos and see how well your makeup holds up, and translates on your photos. At this point, you have an opportunity to tell your MUA what worked well and what didn’t work so well BEFORE the actual wedding day.

 

 

7. Not putting together a timeline/or waiting until the night before the wedding to distribute a timeline. A timeline is crucial to any events success. It establishes order for each of your vendors so that they know when certain key moments are to occur. When you don’t have a timeline to follow, it affects every aspect of the wedding. Suppose you don’t show up to the wedding on time because it took you 3 hours to get ready and to the ceremony site instead of 2 hours. The food may get cold or not ready on time, the officiant may have another wedding they must get to, the family formal photos start late and become rushed, or you only rented the venue for a certain amount of time therefore the event must clear out by a certain time. I can’t emphasize enough the importance of it.

 

Guests are expecting to wait while the new bride and groom are having their photos taken. Utilizing your time wisely can keep them entertained with food and music, and/or you can have a photo booth, which has become a staple at just about every wedding. If you plan it appropriately you can have the photo booth company just standing around with no guests additionally, ensure that don’t have guests getting up from the dinner table during the first dance, or during speeches to participate in the photo booth! I’ve been to a few weddings where the timing was a bit off and the photo booth wasn’t open until the dinner hour and shut down just as the reception and dancing were just starting!

 

Recently, I was discussing a wedding with a photographer that practically begged her couple to provide a timeline two weeks before the ceremony so that she understood where she needed to be and when. She was provided the timeline the night before the wedding only to discover the bride and groom had her shooting the event for twelve hours! She was only contracted for ten. Imagine how awkward it was for her to bring this to the attention of the bride and groom the night before the wedding….{not to mention the stress placed on everyone involved.}

 

8. Not working with a budget. We all want the wedding of our dreams but unless the sky is the limit for your big day, it is probably a good idea to have a budget in mind when planning your wedding. The largest part of your budget typically goes to the venue. You should start with a budget planner. Have fun with it; write down anything and everything you’d love to include in the wedding!! Total up the costs and you at least have a number to begin with. Even if this total is too much to wrap your mind around, it’s at least a place where you can start. Also, make sure that you discuss this budget with your fiancé. This is a perfect beginning to establishing open, honest communication with your helpmate.

 

9. Avoiding the warning signs that one or both of you may not yet be ready to marry. This is a touchy subject for many couples, but one that should not be ignored. Make sure that you and your fiancé are clear in your reasons for marrying. Wedding day jitters are normal, but make sure the jitters don’t begin shortly after the proposal. Something I learned many years ago is to NOT be a people pleaser. Think about what’s more important, you being afraid what people might say if the two of you decide to wait a little while before saying “I do” or making sure that your relationship is on solid ground first before getting married. I think that decision is clear, but the decision is yours and totally up to you. Remember; to thine own self be true.

 

10. Expecting that everything will go “perfectly as planned.” Remember, plan is nothing more than a four-letter word and nothing is perfect. Expect the unexpected and allow for some moments to not go according to plan. Who knows….you might just get lucky enough to end up with a sweet surprise!

To get more tips or get to know me, please visit my website at KishanaHighgate.com or email me directly at Kishana@KishanaHighgate.com.

 

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